Chap 6 -- When the door opened --- part 2
"I do not belong to myself"
Barua stopped for a while and, staring towards a tri-junction, took a pause in his breadth and said, "All of you should look at this junction. This makes me remember something special about a Hindi song. I am not sure whether you all will like it".
His wife Vitono was smiling. Parul said, "Songs are meant to be sung. Mr Barua, please sing for us...".
Vitono almost teased her husband, "Of course, he will. That's about his flame Suchitra Sen".
All of them, including Barua laughed out loud.
But quickly he started singing ..."is mod se jaate hai ..." Parul and two of her sisters-in-law knew it's on Suchitra Sen, the celebrated Bengali film actress of her time and a sensation.
But when the line came ...."ik dur se aati hai paas aake palat ti hai
..... ik raah akeli si; rukati hai na chalati hai". Barua took a pause and voluntarily started explaining ---
"What a line ladies; these speak about the 'mystery' behind each road. One of them comes so near you and then takes a turn to take altogether a new path, never to return again.
Then again, some roads would appear motionless for a while....I fail to understand, why. What a poetry from Gulzar sahab man".
All of them seemed impressed. Barua's wife Vitono said, "He has been singing this song now for years. But he never explained me the lines. In deed, such wonderful lines".
Vitono's eyes looked moist. Parul took note of it. She was a bit surprised.
Parul's life too has taken these turns.
She knew how her life once took a peculiar turn to take altogether a new path and yes, it never did return again to that spot.
Jahar Sen simply disappeared from her life or she disappeared from his. All of it were same.
The mini tourist bus had taken a halt for a while. Barua went other side into the bushes to ease himself. So did the driver.
Women started enjoying the cool hill breeze. The green fields looked untended for months.
The grass mostly weeds - has not been cut in weeks. Parul on her wheelchair, she was being assisted by her two sisters-in-law.
They came out of the main road. It looked a bylane - no risk of vehicle. Even otherwise the movement of cars
and small buses were minimum by now.
Down the bylane, they took a right turn and little upstream a small hillock. There looked a small hut. A typical Naga hut.
For strangers it gave a curious look. It was clear not many people have visited the house or the small hill top.
It looked wonderful.
Vitono said the area once was part of an elephant path and used to be frequented by leopards as well.
At one place, there were some trees - a few of them looked centuries old, very large with numerous branches.
Parul requested Geetanali for a group snap. Vitono also joined them enthusiastically.
Though an Angami, she also hardly comes to these pastoral lands nowadays. Parul and her sisters-in-law were mesmerized by the flowering plants. Very colourful typical to north east India's hills and cold climate.
They could spot a water fall from distance. "Our trip is done Madam Vitono, such a nice place. You are really blessed to be born in this part of India," said Shampa.
Vitono smiled. Her eyes gave an impression, that she wanted to say something.
This time even the curios eyes of Parul - a writer - missed the excitement or surprise in Vitono's eyes.
Two other Bengali ladies from Durgapur - both housewives - did not feel like bothering much. But Vitono was apparently lost for a while.
They all were lost in the beauty of that distant waterfall. Was it like a rare symphony of nature for the urban group? The foggy hills rendered a perfect background.
Parul broke the silence. But she said was surprising to her sisters-in-law. "I don't know why the men group went to Prayagraj or Allahabad. This is the place to be. All of them are missing all these, I will call him this evening".
Geetanjali smiled and retorted back. "That's true Parul. But what is more nice is among us all, you are missing your hubby a lot. This is a story, we will tell him".
Parul giggled while Shampa was smiling on the other side.
Vitono suggested - "All three of you take a pose, I will try taking a good snap though Mr Barua keeps saying I am not good at this".
Shampa said, "Yes, let's do it Parul. But madam Vitono has started missing her Mr Barua so soon".
Vitono was laughing for a while before she clicked the camera number of times for the frames of her three women guests.
Half an hour later just when they were returning, Parul was awestruck momentarily. She told Geetanjali- "Boro Boudi, I think this lanky gentleman coming from the other end".
Minutes later they were closer. Parul spoke out even as the gentleman too stood for a while unable to conceal his surprise and excitement. "Do I know you Sir...Are you from West Bengal?".
The man replied, "I know you pretty well, pretty woman. You are our friend Parul. Ekhane kothae".
Shajal Bhattacharjee was equally glad to meet Parul after all these years. Parul quickly introduced Shajal to everyone. Geetanjali and Shampa greeted their Bengali acquaintance in this strange place with a traditional Nomashkar each.
By then Vitono's husband Mr Barua too has arrived at the spot and said, "All of you seemed to love this place even before reaching Khonoma".
Parul told Barua, "Sir you all please move ahead. I need to talk to Shajal for a while".
Vitono and all others seemed to agree. Barua suggested that a mat would be placed on the field nearby and they will wait for Parul and Shajal for breakfast.
Shajal also agreed. Looking towards Parul's wheelchair, he said, "Please be assured I will bring her on time before the coffee gets cold".
Parul glanced towards her two sisters-in-law; and both understood that Parul was keen for a brief privacy with Shajal.
As others moved ahead towards the field to lay down the mat and the breakfast, Shajal touched Parul's hands.
"Ei sab ki (What's all these Parul).Why you did not marry Jahar?"
Perhaps Parul did not expect such a quick reference about Jahar. Her eyes looked moist.
"This is a long story Shajal. But where is your friend. I really do not know about him for years".
Shajal bent down on a side by rock. Parul's wheelchair was brought to a halt safely.
Shajal said, "There is a long story on the other side too Parul. But my complaint is you did not do justice to that sentimental man. He was different from all of us".
Parul stared towards Shajal. She was trying to smile but looked helpless.
Shajal continued, "You know Parul, at times and typically in critical moments of life, we human beings suffer helplessness. Somehow we seem to lose control in ourselves. May be I am unable to make you understand".
"Bolo..", remarked Parul softly almost in a semi conscious tone.
"You know...," Shajal continued, "... the biggest challenge is we perhaps do not know how to discover and rediscover ourselves as individuals. But Jahar had that quality. He knew he would discover himself".
"How?" - again a quick remark from Parul.
"You know Parul, I have started to realise at this age that it is people like Jahar who would make this human world continue. I am an ONGC engineer, will dig soil here, discover fuel and gold; yet there is nothing much I can give to this world. People like Jahar strive for truth, strive for genuine friendship".
He paused for a while and glanced quickly towards Parul. She looked awestruck but gracious.
"You know Parul, what I was stating is Jahar always used to say, "I do not belong to myself". But Parul, he belonged to you. There was a complete surrender by that idiot.
Parul, I still remember the tea-stall gathering that evening. Jahar said, he was not an ambitious person. What we commonly understand by the term Ambition; he was not".
"That's true Parul, I also agreed. But Jahar was one of those who wanted to see the man inside him flourish and develop into a full authoritative entity," Shajal paused briefly,
"But we all knew that was not his ambition; he wanted to see such a dream only in your presence, as your companion . That dream was his and as well as yours. You brought miracles in his life.
So the moment you discarded him, he fell apart. He thought everything was bluff and falsehood".
Parul was growing impatient, "but where is he, what he is doing"?
Shajal said, "Let's go that side, others will be waiting for us. Parul, Jahar is now in a mental hospital. He took to alcoholism. He failed professionally. Frustration brought him deep depression and now he is a sick person".
By then they had started moving on. Parul's wheelchair was being pushed mildly by Shajal. Now she knew what helplessness about this life is all about.
to be continued
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